Falling apart

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , , , , | Posted on 03:28

13


The flame has not yet died,
It stings me a little deep inside,
And even as you are unaware,
You fuel with every small word,
No matter what they may be.

And the heat eats me away,
Bit by bit, edge by edge,
I fall apart from myself,
Knowing I can't be together,
None to bind me to myself.

Frantically searching for you,
Once I realize the truth in haste,
And stick to keeping the peace,
But somehow I give in again,
Only to live the vicious cycle anew.

I see nightmares in my happiness,
Every lonely day a hopeless struggle,
Braving the unanswered questions,
Crossing the flames of my memories,
Foolishly dreaming of time to turn away.

And you have no doubt of my state,
I'm happy, must be smiling?
Yes, I am, but falling each day,
When once you took me to heights,
You now bring me down with ease.

Waiting still for the last piece,
To fall away and bring peace,
An end even you would cherish,
A blessing I pray for everyday,
Saving me from the curse I live today!

P.S. - Its been a long time since I wrote. And I must say, its good to be back.

Confessions of a sinner

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , , | Posted on 22:34

10


I've cursed the friends who stabbed me,
Instead of hugging the few of them tight.
I've spoken of revenge with all my heart,
Instead of revealing forgiveness's might.

I've never let go of the hurtful moments I've lived,
Instead, treasured them deep in my chaotic mind still.
I've repaid all with the interests they are worthy of,
Instead of going into the pathetic talks of good will.

I've tried to live every moment in extensive smiles,
Instead of being marred by the ungrateful world's scar.
I've went too far and beyond to fetch those happiness,
Instead of stopping and pity for those who lost in the war.

I've fulfilled all the wishes that I have ever breathed,
Instead of praying for someone's wish to come true.
I've trampled others' visions to realize my future's fate,
Instead of preserving their dreams in my hands too.

I've always did what my heart or mind asked me to,
Instead of accounting for the others' incessant call.
I've rejected everything that was ever put before me,
Instead of foolishly attempting to please one and all.

I've never thought of the after life I would be living,
Instead, lived in the present and proved my worth.
I've never believed in walking to a majestic heaven,
Instead, lived a hope filled life on this humble Earth.

Yes, I am a sinner,
And I've never barred anyone from calling me this,
But let me be addressed so by the unblemished souls,
And not by the self proclaimed hypocritical saints,
Who's deeds are flecked with myriad moral holes.

P.S. - Dedicated to the girl who's words inspired me to write this verse. Thank you.

And I...

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , | Posted on 23:27

7


I feel her around,
Watch her walk up to me,
Smile on her red lips,
Flaunts a casual style,
And my heart beats...

I close in on her,
Hold her hands in mine,
Pull her closer to myself,
Put my arm round her waist,
And whisper to her...

I pop up my head,
Half lying just by her side,
Fiddle with her hair locks,
Put my arm above her shoulder,
And get closer to her...

I look at her face,
Calmly resting on my shoulder,
My arms warped around her,
Her arm lazily lining mine,
And her smell...

I watch her fade away,
Clasp at nothing but the air,
Wonder at prelude of loneliness,
Arms droop down, disappointed,
And then walk away...

I wonder if its true,
Or was it once a reality,
Or a dream I saw yesterday,
Or simply a futuristic imagination,
And I...

Dream catchers

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , , | Posted on 07:11

11


In ignorance we build castles in the air,
Confidence marks the path to success,
Innovation brings the future to reality,
And friends' trust comes to the support.

Dreams are what we would call them later,
Now they are the ultimate goal of our future,
And if we ever get them to see this world's light,
Our ambition would be then turned to bitter reality.

We hold those dreams close to our lively hearts,
And keep working with our mechanical minds,
Days on end we suffer the routine and get lost,
In the end, the heart becomes one with the mind.

We lose the vision we had in our bright eyes,
We forget to risk it all on our whim and belief,
And remain shackled in the chains of security,
Accustomed to live the life in this easy regularity.

We give up and turn our backs to our past,
Even as they all could have been entirely ours,
Just like the castles we had build someday,
Believing we would be dream catchers one day.

While the rarest of gems follow their hearts,
Realizing their destiny being etched in gold,
Riding away on success and their old faith,
Running after their dreams, their castles in air.

The ending

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , , , , , | Posted on 14:58

2

I'm skeptic,
I'm pessimistic,
I'm so hopeless,
I'm just not enough.

Its neither the pain,
Nor is it the hurt,
Its neither the hate,
Nor is it the mistakes,
That makes me weep,
As if that is expected!

Its neither the joys,
Nor is it the love,
Its neither the happiness,
Nor is it the victory,
That makes me smile,
As if they are impossible!

Has losing made me a loser,
That I make no note of it anymore?
Or has love made me heartless,
That I suffer at its loss no more?

And yet I'm ecstatic to be this way,
To keep living on each of these days,
Spending them under a gracious silence,
And never try to explore the other ways...

Could a story have a happy ending?
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