"When shall you next come?"She asked in childish disgust.
"Soon enough, I'm waiting...",
I had said with a hint of lust!
And now I walk by her grave,
Vowing never to love again,
Having brutally lost my loved first!
A vague answer was all I had,
And the confusion remains still,
Be it the bright hopeful irritating day,
Or the sulky refreshing night's chill!
As I stare at her grave in disbelief,
Wanting to find reasons to live,
To refrain myself from my own kill.
And all I do is murmur my words,
A group of syllable all confused,
With beads of brine in my eyes,
Which always seems to be glued!
As I mourn by her grave all along,
Trying to wash off the blood,
Of my injured, lost and defeated mood.
I still do what I had always done,
Pouring my silly heart to her,
And then try to relive in the past,
The only moments we had too few.
As I sit by her grave like she was mine,
Trying to seek the wedlock blessing,
From the ignorant heavenly dew.
Trying to read the delusive signs,
Of the self less bird's chatter,
Or the irritated ant's countless stings,
All of which at once seem to matter.
As I rest by her grave still tranquil,
Thinking of ways to get back to her,
Right at the moment or even latter.
The world calling back to me,
Laughing at me in disguise,
But I keep eluding them,
Be it the eternal fool or the wise!
As I cling to her grave so tight,
Never to leave her out of sight,
For no worthy and earthly prize!
The days come to their end,
But my ever lonely miseries do not,
Replenish them myriad times,
Keeping them burning and hot!
As I kiss her grave good night,
Never wanting to part ways with her,
Like I had always thought!
Walking away I try to feel her,
Even when I know she is no more,
Still believing I could live in her absence,
Knowing none could heal this heart's sore,
I keep coming back to her grave,
Not knowing how to ever let her go,
Who was once a part of my soul, my core!