I Never Thought...

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , | Posted on 01:12

"But I'm alone", I thought,
"I'm destined to be so"!
And I accepted it and went on!
On and on... In this teeming world,
Loving the loneliness within me,
Entertaining none but the lonesome me,
Counting every passing minute alone!
And for me that was it,
My heavenly truth of life!
My adventurous way of living!
My not so lucky fate!

I never thought I would love again,
I never thought of being loved again!

Not that this was what I believed,
Not that I was eternally convinced!
Never failing to curse my half life,
I did drag my body along,
Searching for its soul,
I had lost long ago,
So here was I,
Praying and wishing for it,
As my corpse lay on the way,
Decaying and melting away!

But none could I find,
None so unsophisticated,
None who could match her,
Her love, her understanding!
And I felt it was time.....
Time to end this ignorance,
And stop having a childish mind;
Time to interpret the signs,
Rather than keeping them aside;
Time to teach myself,
"Accept and give,
But don't expect while you live"!
So, I rooted my trust in me!

I never thought of a brighter life ahead,
I never thought I was so near being dead!

And yet again I did lose it,
I saw that trust betrayed!
And the jinx did break,
As you walked into my life,
One who could brag in much earlier,
One who could never come at all,
One who was just a chance,
One who was really a no one!
But you were with a difference,
Like an angel to show me,
The way my life is to go,
Making me realize myself!

Suddenly I felt so lucky!
My silent prayers seemed answered,
My secret hopes fulfilled!
As I started dreaming again,
But with my eyes wide open!
I was like an atheist,
Finding proof of God!
Like I got a second life,
A life after death,
I never believed in!
Yet you made me believe,
The unbelievable truth!
"There is love still"!

I never thought you would make me relive,
I never thought you would make me believe!

And still when I wonder,
Wonder why you chose me?
I have a real vague idea,
'Cause I see no good in me!
I'm not an Antony,
All my thoughts are always muddled!
I'm not an Einstein,
Even though I'm not that dull!
I'm not a Brutus,
I've my share of mistakes!
I'm not an Edward,
I'll wither away and die!

But rightly did I call you,
Just before time ran out,
Before the distance so grew,
That it couldn't be traveled!
Then amidst my mental chaos,
My heart winked at me,
And I knew it was right!
And while I do curse myself,
For I made you cry,
Even if I didn't want you in pain,
Yet I do have the courage now,
To see you smile again!

I never thought you could love me,
I never thought you could be my destiny!

Once again I saw love,
Love that mattered most,
Love for the way I am!
It was a shock for me,
Someone who has not known,
Not faced love for an infinity!
But has lived only in the shadow,
Shadow of his past,
A past, sweet and poisonous!
But you pulled me out,
Brought back my senses!
A task to which most had failed,
You seemed to do in a single day!

You had a lot to say,
You said a lot too!
Its just that you don't know,
What you did do!
Small things you did,
Smaller things you said,
And that changed me!
Your love made me,
Strive for excellence!
Your love made me perfect!
As if I wanted nothing else,
Your love made me complete!

I never thought I didn't let her go away!
I never thought you would make me move away!

Now this is my life,
As envious as it can get,
The best I could ever have,
The best I could dream of!
And now its you.....only you.....
My thoughts governed by you,
My heart beats for you!
My words speak of you!
My lips smile for you!
My eyes wander in your search!
My hands craving for your touch!

And while I do have nightmares,
Where I dream of losing you,
'Cause I'm always the unlucky one,
Yet I have faith in you,
I know you will be there!
And I'm living by the hope,
That someday you'll be mine forever,
Someday I'll witness the forgotten,
See my body unite with its soul!
And till then I live with the memories,
Memories of my joyous past,
Days I cherish,
Days I wanna relive....

I never thought of a day without you,
I never thought of anyone but you!

Comments (2)

Hmmmmmmmmm.. a privilege to know the real you!

I'm still to meet you though!
Might be as you write further.

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I've written what I could,
Its time you write what you want,

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