I fell in love - 4 (The blunder)

Posted by Zave | Posted in , , , , , , | Posted on 09:43

Love grew a day older,
And things were never the same again!
"Beauty is not for ever",
So, I'm always ready for exiguous pain!

Those smiles, that feeling,
"I love her", I said to myself,
'Cause the thought of being loved,
Was often a bit more than love itself!

I knew I loved her,
At least that is what I thought,
'Cause I was confused yet!
Might be I was thinking a lot!

Did I say yes 'cause she asked that?
Or did I just take her for granted?
Did I say yes 'cause there was no one else?
Or a girl friend, that was what I wanted?

'Cause this was love!
And I believe in an ethical head!
And before I hurt her feelings,
I would rather be dead!

I'm nearly a no one!
I might be a munificent boy,
But she could find so many with elans,
Find so much more love, care and joy!

Again I thought!
Does she really love me?
It was not even a month!
And she fell in love so easily?

I should feel so much more!
I'm not like 'it' should be!
I definitely lack the verve!
Love still eludes me!

I had a long broody silence,
Which never seemed to end,
Even with her mellifluous voice,
My anxiousness couldn't be mend!

And when I couldn't take my irksomeness,
I decided to speak up!
And I said "No" to her love and care,
Just like a bloody heartless pup!

She was shattered!
Not that I had expected any less!
I could hear her drawling voice,
As she saw herself falling in a mess!

She tried to convince, I was mistaken!
'Cause it was too bad too be true!
I could feel her inner self choked,
With this sudden bolt from the blue!

She felt numb!
She couldn't hear even a bit,
Other than my "I can't give in",
None of my other words had a hit!

Her brain was shutting down every second!
She just heard me say!
She was unemotional!
For her it was happening anyway!

Then all of a sudden it struck!
"Its over", "that is it"!
This was how it had to end,
Her relation with some 'git'!

Her eyes turned red,
She had become inexorable!
And if I would have been there,
She would have hit me with a table!

She was revengeful,
Her wrath knew no bound,
She was hating me,
Her love that she had found!

But as time ticked, she did contrite,
Now blaming not me,
But herself, to be so vile,
"This was never meant to be!"

Thought she had forced me in,
Love, she made me do that!
When we could ever stay that way,
With our long and cute chat!

There I was, trying to be truthful,
Wanting to be ethical,
As I too realised what I just did!
How could I be so brutal?

All I had to do was done!
All I had to say was said,
Yet something was killing me,
Trying to want me dead!

Well, 'it was over'!
No second thought could change that!
'Cause even if I wanted to,
How the hell would I do that?

Twists and turns, is my life's story,
So, my heart yet again went for a toss!
And I did lose her after all,
As I sat thinking of her loss!

Special thanks to 'Lily' for her wonderful and useful feedbacks. It would have been difficult writing this without her.

P.S. - Its the sequel to "I fell in love".

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